As the summer approaches, the holiest day for dads has quickly come upon us; Father’s Day is here already! We would like to extend a warm welcome and a very cold beer to all those who have embraced the glory of fatherhood.
It’s not easy being a father. There are meats to be grilled, cigars to be smoked, and beers to be drank. Many beers. Preferably a 30-rack. So please, show appreciation for those that have answered the call of fatherhood. Whether you’re a Dadentologist, a Boddhist, or even a part of the new and burgeoning Dadenbodism sect of Godbod worship, send a little love to fathers all around the world.
Need some gift ideas? Well, we’re probably too late seeing as it’s already almost 10:00 PM on Father’s Day. Anyway, if you’re maybe looking for gifts for next year’s Father’s Day, look no further than this article.
Gift Idea 1: A 30 Pack of Milwaukee’s Best Ice
It’s harder to find a way to express love more than the gift of 30 delicious Beasts. Nothing says, “Thanks for raising me!” more than crushing 30 beers with your old man.
Gift Idea 2: A Carton of Cigarettes
What does a dad love almost as much as beer? That’s right! Cigarettes! Nicotine was created eons ago by the great Godbod himself. It’s only fitting then, to indulge your father in these holy tobacco sticks. With each cigarette smoked, one becomes slightly closer to meeting Godbod.
Gift Idea 3: A Vape
Welcome to the 21st Century, old man! Nowadays you don’t even need a lighter or cigarette to indulge in sanctified nicotine. One vape, preferably one of those super wasteful disposable vapes, is a surefire way to put a smile on your father’s face. Morning nicotine buzzes have never been easier than now!
And with that, we end this article. We would like to extend a heartfelt thank you to all those that have taken on the exciting challenge of being a dad. Without those to fry up bacon for their kids in the morning, tell terrible dad jokes, and know how to fix up cars, the world would be a much duller place.